Living Together Before Marriage is it good ?

April 20, 2008 | 1 Comment

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Once upon a time when two people fell in love with one another everyone expected to hear wedding bells in the near future. Not anymore. Today the trend would take the besotted couple into a cohabiting arrangement. So common has this fashion become, that in many countries the law has recognized and legalized it in order to protect the rights of children and women who are the most vulnerable in such conditions.

Is Living Together Before Marriage A Good Idea?

A huge number of people surely think that way because the number of couples who decide to live together has all but doubled during the past decade. Couples feel that it is easier to decide whether or not to marry the person they love after they take a “trial run”.

Most of these people shun marriage, not because they do not believe in this institution, but because they hate divorce. Since divorce is the order of the day in the present age, couples do not want to risk marrying and ending in divorce so they agree to leave the door open.

The Advantages Of Living Together Before Marriage

Living together before marriage would help the couple to see each other closer and analyze whether the other is really the “marrying type”. A fear that haunts most couples in love is that after marriage they would fall into stereotype roles which would destroy the feelings they have for each other. With cohabitation, since the possibility of ending the relationship is always there, both the members work hard at the relationship which makes living together before marriage a great proposition.

Another advantage from this arrangement is that money matters are not taken for granted and neither is sex. These are two of the most common marriage busters which in these types of relationships are given their due importance. Since there is no permanent legal commitment, both members feel obligated to play fair and keep one another is the loop on these two aspects.

The Disadvantages Of Living Together Before Marriage

There are a few disadvantages as well. One of the most glaring is the plight of the children who would be born illegitimate, though the society does not frown upon this any longer. However, the children would feel the same trauma when their parents separate (if they do) as with a divorce and the live-in relationships are far easier to break than a marriage.

It is also difficult to keep track of all the common property created which makes it difficult to divide if the relationship does not work out.

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The Basics of Marriage Counseling

March 8, 2008 | Leave a Comment

Almost half of all marriages end in divorce. That is why there is an increase in couples seeking marriage counseling. Nobody wants to think that the marriage they are in will end. Marriage counseling offers a way for couples to work thorough problems with an outside influence. Marriage counseling can help couples to rebuild a marriage that was on the way to divorce.

Marriage counseling is a type of therapy that helps married couples resolve problems they may be having in their marriage. Most often counseling is conducted with both partners present. However, sometimes there will be individual sessions depending on the couples needs. The basis for marriage counseling is research that has shown problems in a marriage are best solved through communication and working together. Marriage counseling usually lasts a short period of time, until the problems are resolved and the marriage is back on track and the couple can handle problems on their own. In a session the counselor will ask questions, listen and analyze problems. The counseling usually starts with an analysis of the marriage and its problems. Then the problems are worked through to an amicable conclusion.

Marriage counselors are trained in psychotherapy. They also have an understanding about families, how to understand client’s needs and problems. They also have training that allows them to help clients work through the problems to reach conclusions. All of this training lets them be able to identify underlying problems. A good marriage counselor will not make a client feel guilty or blame. They will teach clients to work through problems and get over bad feelings.

Marriage counseling can help couples open the lines of communication. Communication has been shown to be the key to a healthy and happy relationship. Couples with problems seek marriage counseling o get a better understanding of what has went wrong in their marriage, so they can once again have a string marriage.

Jeanette Pollock is a freelance author and website owner. She publishes articles and reports in various ezines and also contributes on a regular basis to FreeNetPublishing.com.

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